Monday, May 12, 2008

GIRLFRIENDS RULE! Well, most of the time.


I know, I know, I'm going to hear about it. I dumped the AMG girls for a boy.

So shoot me.

I had fun.

When I was married I used to live for girls nights. Waiting all week or month, for that matter, to hook up with one girlfriend or another for some reason we always made up. My kids were little and I just needed a break. We all needed a break.

Fast forward 10, 15 years. The husband goes and dies on me. The girlfriends rally around me. Wow, that's when you really know who your friends are. And believe me, I realized I had plenty. And for that I am truly blessed. A topic that's been covered here more than once.

But lets face it people. I've been having "Girls Nights" for five years now. And no offense, but If I have one more fucking girls night, I'm going to scream.
So when I get a chance to have a "Boys night". Sorry girls, not to be rude, but I'm outa here.
When you're 50 and have a body like I do, there isn't a line forming to the right, like there is for some of us. Anyway, if my "friend" asked me to go somewhere, I don't give a shit what the hell night it is. I'm in. (Actually, I'm not, but it was his birthday, so I felt sort of obligated. So there, I confessed)

But hell yeah, I had fun. And you all lived without me.

Imagine that?

So Friday I went to a 50th Birthday party for one of Dan's cousins. Her name is Angela and was Dan's favorite on the Italian side. (Notice Mar, I said "On the Italian side") She is also one of my favorites. So I got my passport out and headed through the tubes.
And yeah, you guessed it, it was another fuckin girls night.

We went to this place in the South Hills that, rumor has it, used to be a mob hang out. And it certainly looked the part. You can't believe this place. It was a pick up place for old people.

Angela is too funny. She said she picked this place to celebrate her birthday because she didn't want to look old. She said that we would all look great compared to what was there. And boy was she right. There was one lady who had a gold lame mini dress on. She probably was about 60. She look every bit of 70. As my mother would say "She looked like twenty miles of bad road--- and the road was only ten miles!"

Holy Hell. I was getting whip lash because my head was spinning in all directions. I didn't know where to look next. At one point we were all sitting together at the table and I told all of the woman there to look around them. The crazy assortment of people around them was what is "out there" I told them they should appreciate their husbands. Because the grass always looks greener on the other side. It's not.

We ended up having a great time though. And would have no matter where we went.

It wouldn't be an Italian party without a "Favor" Wonder why they get so into this? I don't even take them at showers and parties anymore. I accidentally "forget" them.But these I liked. (Again, Angela knows how to throw a party right down to making useless favors useful.)

We each got a little bottle of wine and attached was a little tag with a bunch of sayings. I've decided to share them with you all.
  • Are we simply romantically challenged, or are we sluts?

  • If we could perpetually do blowjobs to every guy on earth, we would own the world. And at the same times, have our hands free. (my personal favorite)
  • Maybe some woman aren't meant to be tamed. Maybe they need to run free until they find someone just as wild to run with them.

  • So what are we going to do? Sit around bars, sipping Cosmos and sleeping with strangers when we're 80?
  • Woman are for friendship, men are for fucking.

  • There are no good girls gone wrong - just bad girls found out.

  • I wrote the story myself. It's about a girl who lost her reputation and never missed it.
  • It's the good girls who keep diaries, the bad girls never have the time.
  • There are two kinds of woman, those who want power in the world and whose who want power in bed.
  • World peace, multiple orgasms and fancy boxed chocolates in that order.
  • Amazingly enough, I don't give a shit.

  • You don't really blow on it. That's just an expression.

  • Let's talk about how fabulous you think I am.
Well folks, the above list is one of the reasons I think Angela is fabulous. Happy 50th girlfriend.
(One of the above is a quote by Jackie Onassis. Any guesses on which one?)


As for Thursday. I don't have a date yet girls, so I guess I'll be out.

1 comment:

Judi said...

Hey....Angela & Kate suggested I find your blog to check it out! BTW....did you know that I did the wine bottle favors....50% Irish/50%Italian me....Judi!
What a fun blog! And, a great review of Angela's 50th.
Feel free to visit mine....the Welcome mat is out!
Great meeting you at A's 50th!
Judi