Monday, March 02, 2009

The Peas And Carrots Post

OK, so here's my peas and carrots story.

(It's probably not going to be funny anymore, oh well)

Friday I went to Sure Save. I know. Its a ghetto store, but hey, times are tough, ya know? And it's cheap. Really, really cheap.

So I'm getting my box of pasta for my pasta casserole. (That other person is still taking over my body. Don't know how to rid my body of her but this nut cooked three dinners over the weekend.)

Anyway, I'm deciding what kind of pasta to use and this little old gray haired, nutting looking older lady taps me on the shoulder.

LOCL: Hey hon, do you see Delmonte peas and carrots?

Me: Let me look. Here are Sure Save peas and carrots.

LOCL: No, Delmonte are on sale.

Me: No. I don't see any. They are usually right next to the sure save brand.

LOCL: I DON'T WANT THE SURE SAVE BRAND.

Me: That is all I can see. Oh, here. Here is a little can.

LOCL: How much?

Me: 85 cents.

LOCL: I ain't paying 85 cents for that little thing.

Me: Smiling, starting to walk away.

LOCL: Try looking again.

Me: No, I don't see any larger peas and carrots except the small one. eyes start to roll.

LOCL: THEY DO THIS ALL THE TIME. THEY ADVERTISE THINGS AND DON'T HAVE THEM. I HAD MY HEART SET ON PEAS AND CARROTS. NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?

Me: Uh, sorry. Bye.

LOCL: I can't believe you can't find any large cans. I am not paying 85 cents for that little thing.

Me: Bye.

LOCL: Still yelling at me because ghetto Sure Save in Bloomfield doesn't have Delmonte Peas and Carrots. Like it's my fault.

What I wanted to do was yell this: LADY I DON'T GIVE A FUCK THAT THEY DON'T HAVE YOUR DELMONTE PEAS AND CARROTS. HERE, TAKE THE FUCKING SURE SAVE BRAND AND SHUT UP.

It seems I always have issues with that store. When it used to be Foodland, I actually got kicked out. I swear. Ski will tell you.She still brings that episode up. It was 20 years ago and I got into a fight with a cashier over milk. The security guard, aka. Barney Fife escorted me out.

I told him where to go.

Another time they thought they caught a tiny kid stealing and were screaming pretty inappropriate thing to him. When they searched him, apparently he didn't have anything. We got into a little tiff that time also.

I'm thinking my picture is hanging in the office. Probably with darts in it. And no, I don't buy anything that isn't wrapped prior to me getting there!

I guess the moral of this story if I better stay away from Sure Save!

2 comments:

Judi said...

Go to Aldi's sweetie! I know, I know, you gotta cross into the suburbs. But, like you said...times are tough...! And, it appears you're changing your ways....cooking and all.
Judi

Comedy Goddess said...

Never a good plan to engage in conversation with crazy people.

Saw your comment at Vodka Mom's and I am glad I stopped by.